I never thought I’d say this, but even I am not invincible . The last couple of months I’ve been on walking on my toes when it comes to my arthritis. It was killing me but I wanted to go on and do the house work and go to work like nothing was wrong.

I took some off days to relax a little and hopefully recharge so I would feel better. But last weekend it come to a sudden stop. It seemed like I walked straight into a brick wall. Not only couldn’t I cope physically anymore but mentally I was on overload as well. My body just said ‘This is enough’ and my weeks of continuing like nothing was wrong came back to haunt me. Mentally I had to (once again) deal with the fact that I’m not your typical 24 year old. Actually I haven’t been typical since I was 14 and was diagnosed with arthritis. So trying to deal with all of that I broke down on Saturday and cried my eyes out, just because I want to do the things any ‘normal’ (which of course is only relative because what exactly is normal?) person my age would do.

Being the stubborn (did I say that out loud?) person that I am, I went back to work last monday but I just couldn’t do my job. So after an hour I was allowed to go home and take a week off just to recharge and try to relax and cope with the fact that I always have to take the consequences of my actions in mind, even though my actions are just doing my job.

I have to say that mentally I’m doing fine now. It’s just a little break down now and again because it just sucks to have arthritis. I guess anyone who’s chronically ill has that once in a while. Physically however I’m still a bit of a mess. The weather is constantly changing so my body can’t get used to either the sun, cold or rain which causes extreme pains throughout my body. For now I’m back on my medication (the one that knocks me out completely) and found a little gap between naps to write this explanation of my ‘disappearance’.

The above is probably also the reason why I neglected SB for such a long time. I just didn’t have the energy to write anything or visit my dailies. My laptop has hardly been on the last months. The energy it took me to just go on with my daily chores was too much to do anything else.

So my sincere apologies to all my visitors and the people I (used to) visit daily. I hope to have my health under control shortly so I can catch up with you all. Also, the people I asked to trade with me in the QBee and haven’t put up their patch yet, it’s not because I changed my mind about trading but because of my health. I hope to have the energy to put your patches up soon too.

Ooh, and as far as NaNoWriMo goes… that turned into a No-NaNoWriMo for me for obvious reasons .

Plugged: Laarni, Amber, Janet, Crissy, Nan, Dre

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